Day 45

Title pretty much says it all. Today is day 45 without pain meds. There were days last week that I wanted to take a pain med to get some relief but I didn't. I realize that each day I make it without pain meds is a day that God's strength has allowed me to make it through the day. All I can do is pray that God will protect me and that he will provide what I need for that day. I've realized that this trial, without having health insurance is a time for me to release my control issues to God. I have no control of it. Well its more of a smacking me in the face telling me that I cannot control things as I'd like to that God is in control.

We've been talking about God reshaping us, and I know this is a time where God is reshaping me. It's kinda scary. I need to trust that everything will be safe. I want to see what God is going to do with my life. I need to trust in His plan for me.

I would love to go on a Missions trip but I don't know if my body could handle that. We will see of where God takes me.